Two Year Old Tornado

I wish I had some pictures to share of my day today. You would be laughing out loud. Maddy has been a complete tornado and I have been one step behind her the entire day. The house is a wreck. I am a wreck, and Maddy seriously needs a bath. Here's a little glimpse:

As I was finishing getting ready this morning, Maddy pulled off her diaper and pee peed on the carpet then handed me the diaper. Oh, it was a brand new fresh diaper. While I was cleaning it up, she saw an opportunity to explore the bathroom and I caught her putting on deodorant. We head downstairs for breakfast and I feed her a bowl of oatmeal, which she actually eats with her spoon and not two hands like she did yesterday. Ok, I think, maybe the crazy is done. Oh no, just beginning. As I was cleaning up the dishes I put her at the sink to play in the water. She loves this and it keeps her safely occupied for a good 15 minutes. I cleared the area around the sink of any possible contraband and let her at it with a bowl and spoon and funnel. Except, I didn't get the lavender hand lotion far enough away. She pumped it into the spoon and then pretended to scrub her head with it. Luckily, she stripped her own clothes off while playing at the sink, so I didn't have to peel wet clothes off of her. We headed upstairs to get dressed and she tinkled again on the stairs. The carpeted stairs. I clean up the second tinkle, diapered the naked butt and we head back downstairs for a little playtime. This actually goes well. I leave her for a bit (bad idea) to finish cleaning up the kitchen scene and she pulls out about 20 DVDs from their cases. I still can't find a few of the cases. I need some food at this point, it's about 10:30, so I set her up at the kitchen island with markers (washable only) and a coloring book. I fix a snack and look over and she has colored zebra stripes all over her tummy. I am not making this up, she has done many of these things before, just not all in one day! I don't think I ever got her dressed again until after dinner. I finally had enough, the markers and lids are now all over the floor, so I stick her in front of the TV to watch Caillou while I make an attempt to clean up. I don't mind admitting that the TV can be a lifesaver for someone about to lose their mind. I'm so glad no one heard me have a complete hissy fit over the markers. I know the mailman didn't hear me, he would have had me hauled away. We actually manage to have a decent lunch and a little play time- together- and I take her up for nap. She falls asleep instantly, thank goodness. I don't even think she wiggled after I set her down. I drop onto my bed, watch a little Ugly Betty on TiVo and fall asleep. I wake up to Ina Garten, the Barefoot Contessa, making a roast turkey and other yummy stuff and so I feel like cooking. I had planned a frozen pizza tonight, since Marc is out at his class (still not home yet, lucky dog) so I pop that in the oven and figure out what I can bake to satisfy my brainwashing from the Food Network. I have been wanting to make sourdough bread and I made my own starter about a week ago. I think to myself that today would be a good day to try it. Bad idea. It turned out to be a hard lump. I threw in the frozen pizza and ate it while Maddy ate a few chicken nuggets. She finished first and disappeared for a moment, uh oh, not a good idea. She returned and handed me a #2 dirty diaper. I cleaned her up, finally dressed her (5:30 at night) and we head out the door to the grocery store where she is, thank goodness, a complete angel. I reward her with a giant turkey balloon and many hugs and kisses. So I am about to take her up for a bath. While writing this Marc came home and grabbed the rest of the pizza and he is entertaining Maddy. I can hear them singing Do Re Mi together right now. I think the tornado has possibly run out of steam. I know her mommy has. A quick bath, jammies, stories, and hopefully a quiet night for everyone. Tomorrow is another day.